There is no "I" in wedding...or wait, there is no "I" in team and there really shouldn't be one in wedding either! In the past few weeks, I jumped on the crazy roller coaster of emotions known as the "Countdown 'til Your Wedding" Ride (cue the shrieks, swears and the occasional "wheeee"). Although I'm a social creature, I have mainly been tucked inside since January 1st doing wedding research until my eyes have dried up from the unforgiving glow of the computer. Luckily, I've spent time with 3 of my lovely bridal party lasses in the past week and heard a similar echo from them all: When can we help, what can we do? My best male friend even offered to make me chocolate covered strawberries. How did I say no to that?
The main question is, why haven't I asked for help? Either:
A: I don't want to burden other people's lives with tasks that are not their responsibilities, OR
B: My over controlling work horse personality has emerged and is preventing me from asking for help.
Well maybe it's a bit of both for all brides. Since the resounding scream from my inner circle was finally being heard, I poked around the internet to figure out a game plan (just in time for the Super Bowl) for my best ladies and gents.
5 Ideas for Successful Delegation
1. Recruit your Talent
Ok, you may already have your all star bridal lined up ready to do your bidding, but who else in your circle has some skills they may wanna flex? For example, I initially forgot my gorgeous sister in law is the master of crafts. One click of an emailed bunting pic and now I have her Canadian Etsy-esque self pumping out projects. Examine your guest list for those hidden gems who may want to support you and actually enjoy the process.
2. Legwork Support
RIGHT NOW! Step away from the computer, unless you are typing an email asking for help, and rest those eyes. One of your family/friends may be a Google expert who can help sift through the best hair and make up artist reviews or florists to cut down your search time. Friends may even have previous knowledge or wedding goodies you can tap into. Both of my previously married friends had vendor advice and my 7 months pregnant bridesmaid even dragged out borrow-able items from her wedding stash for me.
3. All Hands on Deck
Are you DIY-ing anything? Even if you aren't, what about those daunting invitation envelopes that need to be addressed? I finally have a DIY par-tay in the works and yes, I did ask for those choco-strawberries to make an appearance. Provide your friends with some snacks and dranky-dranks, and your team will be more than eager to take up calligraphy as a new talent. Just make sure they aren't too many sheets to the wind or you could end up with some failed Pinterest results.
4. What's Your Vision?
Make sure you give people pics, directions and a clear cut idea of what you want, or you can't get salty when your bouquet is more dollar-store shabby than vintage chic. You are responsible for providing the goods and guidance, while they help with the services. On a positive note, in my experience as a bridesmaid, I always wanted to help more and was just waiting for directions.
5. Practice Gratitude
Ultimately, you are the one who needs assistance so make sure you show appreciation at all times. Yes, you will provide an awesome gift to those who help you, but don't forget that small thank-yous, a free coffee, a hug, a wedding shout out or kind words can be even better than fancy material things.
These ladies don't even know they are going to be my Despicable Me-style minions soon.
Kate Swem is a recently married lady living in Chicago. Her husband, Raja, is her blogging coach, fellow Netflixia sufferer (The Strain is now in rotation) and adventure twin. Tune in to hear about her wedding reflections and advice! You can follow her on Twitter, or read more on her and her best friend’s blog, Chi Organic Girls.